I remember. But now I don’t mind.

I remember. But now I don’t mind.

I remember the tears. I remember puting babies to bed after bath time and then sneaking to the garage to sob into a pillow so they wouldn’t hear.

I remember. But now I don’t mind.

I remember being told I was crazy. I remember hearing I was the reason he left. I remember being told to “get over it.”

I remember. But now I don’t mind.

I remember five dollar pizzas for dinner. I remember sitting at that kitchen table with the end chair empty, trying to make a new normal and still sit down as a family.

I remember. But now I don’t mind.

I remember the fear. The fear of the lies. The fear of night. The fear of failing.

I remember. But now I don’t mind.

I remember. But now I praise Him instead of beg Him. I remember. But now I am strong. I remember. But now I trust His plan. I remember. But now I don’t think about it. I remember.

I remember.

I will never forget.

But now I don’t mind.

And I don’t mind, because my past does not define me. I don’t mind, because I am who HE says I am. I don’t mind, because I know I made it through.

I made it through because I will never forget.

But now…

Now I don’t mind.